So, it's been a month so far and things are going great! I've settled into my temporary home in Cambridge, have met some wonderful people and made a few new friends, and have been thoroughly enjoying my courses and how much I'm learning about the world of education!
Here are some photos from my journey so far!!!
Orientation begins!
First day of classes!
Harvard Yard
Even though I've been a Sox fan forever and had already given up on them for the season, a random person walking by my friend and I at an outdoor bar gave us tickets to a game because she couldn't attend! How could you say no??
Shots from a run on the Charles!
A star side plank on the John Harvard statue!
(Yes, I cleaned my hands afterwards!!! I guess people pee on it!)
Fall foliage outside my building!
And here are some shots of my room and bathroom, decorated just enough to make me happy and not break my bank on things that aren't permanent! The vinyl wall decals were already there from the previous tenant, so they matched my West Elm bedding perfectly so I kept them up there! And, the four mirrors in the second shot were leftovers too....left those up as well!
And just a great quotation from an article that I think all teachers would love!
So, I have old hollow 1950s doors in my house. I only have one hallway closet and I wanted to make more use of the space by using a over-the-door shoe rack. I hate using the actual over-the-door hooks because the door never closes cleanly and they gauge the trim. I researched and learned that they make special anchors for hollow doors---yes!
I grabbed a packet of these from Lowe's for a few dollars and a 5/16 drill bit from my dad's toolbox.
Here is the door:
The lovely anchors:
First, I used the over-the-door hooks to place the rack and used a pencil to mark the holes. Then, I drilled the holes and inserted all of the anchors:
Then, I place the shoe rack up against the holes/achors and threaded the screws through the mounting holes rack and screwed into place (the screw heads are larger than the holes).
Tonight, I tore apart my hall closet's storage bins and shelves to avoid grading some tests (#I'llregretthistomorrow).
I learned a few things:
1. I hold onto half used bottles of body lotion WAY too long.
2. I have a phobia of throwing out perfumes/lotions/body scrubs/etc. that come in gift sets that I have received from family & friends on holidays. If I don't like the scent, I just shove it into the closet and pretend it's not there. I'm bringing them into school and putting them in the faculty bathroom so someone can benefit!
3. I have A TON of travel size toothpastes and flosses!
4. Pet hair somehow finds its way into the closet?
5. I have enough Wallflowers (Bath & Body Works) refills to last 4-5 years.
6. I have enough tampons to last 1-2 years (see the photo of all of the boxes!)
I ended up throwing out this:
And, ending up with this--a much less cluttered version of what was there before. Next to the brown bins on the second and third shelves, I had clear rubbermaid bins that I hadn't opened in a year....maybe 2. So, I knew it was time to purge.
I had these rubbermaid drawer organizers already but now they contain much less! Purged everything I don't see myself using in the foreseeable future!
Last April, I traveled to Holland and purchased some tulip bulbs. Over the last two weeks, I've had the pleasure of seeing them bloom in all of their Dutch glory!
I looked back in my journal last night and I found an entry from March 9, 2009. It was only three weeks after my marriage ended and I was left feeling very uncertain about where my life would go. I wrote about how I couldn't imagine every day life without him---no weekends hanging together, no kisses upon arriving home, no dinners together anymore...I even said "I just can't imagine a few years form now when we have no contact at all" and here I am, knowing what it's like today and not really caring about it any more.
Well, the me in March of 2009 could have never predicted what great news would enter my life in March 2012! About 6 months ago, I was on the phone with a mentor of mine, my department head at school who just retired, and she encouraged me to take some chances in my professional career and finally go back to school for my Masters degree. She said I shouldn't settle for just any old place or any old degree and that I needed to strive for the best that was out there--Harvard University. I just sort of shook my head at her like "C'mon, Harvard....you've got to be kidding me...." I explored the website and found I'd have to get my butt in gear to study for the GREs as it had been 10 years since I've graduated from college and 14 years since I did any math in high school. My friends and colleagues at school tutored me in math and I even audited some precalc and geometry classes at school--my students got a real kick about Ms. M being in the classroom with them! Nov 11, I took my GREs and came out having done pretty well!
I met with my superintendent about taking a year leave from school to go to school fulltime. He was really supportive and very enthusiastic for the daring endeavor I was about to take on.
Then, on Nov 19, my dad and I went up to Harvard for an information session for the Graduate School of Education. It became pretty clear to me that all of this was moving into action.
My application was due on January 4th. I wrote, rewrote, revised, and revised my statement of purpose a few times. Then, it was all done. All I had to do was wait.....until March 26 for the school's decision on my application.
Much to my surprise, on March 5, I received an email saying my decision was ready to view.
ADMITTED!!!!
They picked ME!!?!? I read the decision letter over and over, trying to make sure I was reading it correctly.
I cannot believe I was accepted and that I get to study for one year at one of the world's best universities. It's all so surreal.
Here's to life taking us down a pathway that we never expected! If I had stayed married to that liar, I know for a fact this would never be happening in my life! The universe has a way of balancing the scales, doesn't it??
So, I try the best I can to always be hopeful, to always be an optimist that someday, I will fall in love again. I've dated a few men in my three years of singledom and while some of them have been great guys and I've learned a lot through these experiences, I have not fallen in love since my ex-husband.
One guy I've dated a little over a year ago, brought to me by Match.com, really made me feel sparks. I even wrote in my journal "this is the type of guy I've been praying God would bring into my life" and after about 5 dates, he disappeared...literally. He just never called, texted, or emailed me again. He had told me how much he liked me, I told him how much I liked him. He was giddy and excited around me as I was to him and then POOF, gone. I confronted him about it about a month later after spending four consecutive weeks obsessing about what I could have done to scare him off---of course, the problem was me, right? (irrational thinking alert!) I retraced every step I had taken, every phonecall, voicemail, text, etc. I made it a point not to come on too strong, to take things in stride and it was unfolding beautifully and then he was gone. My therapist suggested I confront him, so I emailed him. I never expected to get a reply, but a week later, he did reply. He apologized, said I did nothing wrong, that he did, in fact, like me and acted like a coward. About 75% of me believed his words....the other 25% bitter part just chalked it up to "canned things to say when you meet someone else who you'd rather date than this girl" talk. To this day, I think of him and wish things could've been different, I suppose because he's been the only one to make my heart just...fall/fludder/skip a beat/insert cliché here?
Recently, I broke it off with a great guy after 8 weeks of dating. I just don't think he was great for me. I liked him, I had fun with him, but something inside me didn't make time for him. He was kind, thoughtful, cute, smart, ambitious, and he liked me. However, there was something missing for me. That something, I've come to theorize, is that seed that would grow into love.
Right now, I'm feeling pretty bummed about the whole single scene. It feels like a job some times. So many people ask me if I've met anyone, if I'm dating, if I've tried online dating.....yes, yes, and yes. But, have I found love yet? No, and that makes me sad. Sometimes, I really get angry that I've gone through so much with leaving my marriage and I was at a place where I was ready to be a wife, but it was taken from me. I'm not sure what else I can do to put myself out there to meet men, but I tell you, it's hard. Presently, I feel like just taking a break from it all...
This scene from the Sex & The City series describes how I feel right now:
